There can be only one Captain Morgan. Yes, while we love our swashbuckling, rum-guzzling friend that helps us drown our sorrows on a Saturday night, when it comes to being Captain Morgan, we have to give it to the Premier League-winning captain of Leicester City. Because, if we don't, he'll find us and crush our skull with one hand (he seems that strong).
Commercial partnership that involve footballers usually don't get a lot of press, but that's because they tend to be wholly uninteresting. When it comes down to it, it essentially involves the footballer earning another pocketful of cash.
However, the Foxes centre-half's contract with Captain Morgan rum is simply hilarious. In fact, for a man who has put pen to paper on a contract that has earned him £30,000-a-week, he claims it is perhaps the best contract he's ever signed.
Well this could be the best contract I've ever signed @CaptainMorganEU  pic.twitter.com/1wbjIKvDTf
Here are some of the excellent stipulations written into the contract.
But that's not all.
The contract also stipulates that Morgan must, at times, wear the Captain Morgan costume, presumably while not playing Premier League football.